Things I Wish My Spouse Understood/Appreciated

Hubby: Stoppage Time 
Wifey: What is that, the amount of times I stop your amorous advances?

Wifey: The Infield Fly Rule 
Hubby: Does that have something to do with my zipper?? What do you want, I'm European!

Hubby: Black Adder/Fawlty Towers/Monty Python 
Wifey: Sorry, I don't get your British snake references...

Wifey: My Infatuation with British Royalty 
Hubby: Oh sure, you slobber over their young prince, but can't get their humor?!

Wifey: Why I Want a Monkey 
Hubby: What you want is a cute little gorilla baby! And you know what happens when it grows up to be a giant Silverback and gets all Alpha Male on us?  He'll go from pet to your new husband after he pounds me into the ground, that's what!  Hope ya like your new furry sexlife!

Hubby: How an Ape is not a Monkey Anyways
Wifey: Oh fine, be all technical about it! I still want one.
 
Wifey: The Significance of the Electoral College 
Hubby: Oh, yes, please DO explain that one to me. Your silly, antiquated system...
 
Hubby: The Significance of the Phoenix Saga 
Wifey: That's to do with the comic strips, right??

Wifey: Twitter 
Hubby: It just encourages that annoying netspeak that we hate! And the character limit means you can't finish a