-Alicia Keys declaring that gangsta rap is not the voice of disenfranchised urban black youth at all. No, no. It was invented by the white man to destroy all black people!
(I can see it now. Some white CIA agents in a secret location working it all out:
-"How do we destroy them? How?"
-"I got it! Listen to this: 'Yo! I was walking down the street....chaka-booom, with my own two feet! Chakaboom, shoot the cops!"
-"My God man, that's perfect! They'll eat it up! And it will destroy them!" *Evil laughter*)
-Paris Hilton believing she deserves to be famous.
(And a generation's worth of brainless teenagers who seem to agree with her. Be afraid. Be very afraid.)
-'New York' believing she is talented.
(Perhaps one day she'll realize her show is really based on viewers slowing down during zapping to stare at the terrifying car wreck that she calls her 'personality.')
-Various celebrities who think it's perfectly alright to give your babies ridiculous names. Like:
Apple
Story
Ocean
Moon Unit
Audio Science
Pilot Inspektor
(For those who like naming their kids using common words that refer to objects and jobs)
Coco
Suri
Tallulah
(For those who simply have no taste)
George I, II, III, IV, and V
Prince Michael I and II
Messiah Ya’majesty
(For those who are lazy and/or have aristocratic delusions of grandeur)
Kyd
Tu Morrow
(For those who mistakenly believe their puns are clever)
Zoltan
Kal-El
Seven Sirius
Moxie CrimeFighter
Sage Moon Blood
(For the truly insane)
Tabooger
(For those who just really hate their kid)
-Tom Cruise believing that taking aspirine will allow Xenu to eat your babies.
(Or something)
-Mel Gibson believing that a lot of booze will prevent the Jews from eating his babies.
(Or something)
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Posted by: HowardeJohns | May 26, 2011 at 01:29 AM